You ever been in a situation where some asks you something ultra-omega-dumb? Like, “Why is your username Bob the Zombie?” I get that, all the time. And you know what? I am sick of it.
The worst part is when they want to know why and what the name refers to. So I reply scoffing because I know what real ultimate fandom is and they don’t. So I say, “Are you ultra-omega-dumb or something?”
“Bob the Zombie, you know,” I say hopingly but intentionally mean like, “From the Night of the Living Dead Series? You know the one that the scientists train to speak and do “human” stuff even though they are zombies.And EVERYONE knows that Zombies are ultra-omega-dumb!”
Most of time I get stared and sometimes people just turn and walk away from me like I smell bad. You know what I want to say to them, "I don’t smell bad, YOU SMELL BAD!” And point my angry index finger in their face! Yeah, Yeah, Yeah and then send my super-alpha-robot-ninja-zombie-minion-army after their hippy asses!
They will try to fight back with the hemp laser guns and save a cow eat a tree, but remember trees have feelings too kung fu! But my robot ninja zombie army will stop them with their Super-Alpha-kung fu, exploding undead ninja stars with skulls on them, and ballistas while I stand triumphant on the hilltop.
My robot-ninja-zombie flag waving in the background, as I make laughing faces but the sound of laughter doesn’t come spilling out until 10 seconds later! Those hippies since they can’t ever do anything by themselves will try to call for Emo kid back up. It will be tough because they have Emo-Kid-Mortal-Combat-Style kung fu!
But, I’ll get my robot-ninja-zombie army to get their secret back up, the ultra-secret-shut-your-mouth-shaft-Redneck Zombie task force to help save the day.
Yeah they will be sorry that I brought out my can of woopass! They will go crying home to their mommies saying, “Bob the Zombie is a mean doo-dee-head!” You know what I say, “No you are the doo-dee-heads, cause I have to perpetuate that stereo type!”
No but seriously, back to what I was talking about you can't go wrong with anything related to Redneck Zombies. Not even Redneck Zombies created by Troma In fact they are the best kind of Redneck Zombies. Just on par with Robot Ninja Zombies, but not on par with Ninja Zombie Robots.
Seriously, they are different.
Robot Ninja Zombies are undead biomechanical ass kicking machines!
Ninja Zombie Robots are Robots that are ninjas that are undead. That’s just lame! How can a robot be undead? Seriously!
So you better watch out and read, read, read! Cause the next time you ask something ultra-omega-dumb something bad could happen.
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